by John O'Sullivan
Parents ask me all the time if I
think their child has what it takes to play at the college or professional
level. They are asking if I think their kid has enough talent. My reply:
“How much are your kids willing to
suffer?”
The answer to that simple question
will go a long way in determining whether any athlete will reach his potential,
and perhaps play at an elite level. Sorry to burst many bubbles, but if
athletes are not willing to suffer, chances are slim that they will make it.
The will to suffer and endure not only separates average athletes from elite
ones, but it separates talented elite athletes from their peers as well.
Now I know that genetics, deliberate
training, coaching, and a whole slew of things go into the development of
athletes. To place all your emphasis on any one factor is ill advised, and very
narrow minded. Some people do this with the so-called “10,000 Hour Rule” of
deliberate practice, while others believe that you either have talent or you do
not.
I
am in the business of training elite soccer players. I have been doing this for
nearly 20 years. I have learned that no one factor takes an athlete to the next
level. A combination of factors do, and for me, an athlete’s
willingness to suffer, his or her comfort with being uncomfortable, is often a
strong determinant upon whether they reach their potential, or instead become
another one of those “shoulda, coulda, woulda” players.
The current mythology of overnight
success, where we are lead to believe every success story was born with the
talent, has blinded us to the fact that the elite athletes we see on television
have all suffered. They have practiced and toiled for long hours, day after
day, when no one was watching. Time and again, when they wanted to quit, they
did one more repetition, ran one more lap, and trained a few minutes longer.
They gave up time with friends and family to pursue their craft. They make it
look easy because of the thousands of hours that they made it hard on
themselves. They willingly made themselves uncomfortable! They suffered because
they knew that they had to in order to succeed.
Most of the athletes I work with
will not ever achieve their true potential, because the thought of suffering
and discomfort frightens them. Some just do not like being out of their comfort
zone. Others have a fixed mindset, and are afraid that if the give their best
and come up short they are some kind of failure (which of course they are not),
so they never try.
Far too many have been coddled by
their parents and protected from failure. Others have had coaches who let them
give less than their best because they were a 12 year old star. When a coach
got tough, these players were used to backing off. When they encountered
adversity, their parents stepped in and intervened, instead of using it as a
teachable moment. When given the choice of whether to embrace suffering, or
pull back, these athletes often chose the easy path. That is why they will not
make it.
Anson Dorrance is the women’s soccer
coach of the twenty-two time National Champion University of North Carolina. He
once encountered Mia Hamm, the reigning college player of the year, and already
one of the top players in the world, training by herself early one morning on a
hot, humid summer day. As he watched, she pushed herself through sprint after
sprint, falling to the ground and gasping for breath after each. He wrote the
following message to her:
“The true vision of a champion is
someone bent over, drenched in sweat, at the point of exhaustion, when no one
else is watching.”
Mia Hamm went on to become the best
player in the world, not only because she had talent and great coaching, but
because she was willing to suffer more than her competitors.
Are you instilling a willingness to
suffer in your athletes? In your kids? Are you challenging them, making them
uncomfortable, pushing them hard, and then pushing a little harder?
Are your kids willing to suffer?
If they are not, they can still do a
lot of things in life, but becoming an elite athlete is probably not one of
them.
Help them build the will to suffer,
to endure in the face of great obstacles, and the ability to cherish the
opportunity to struggle, and chances are far greater that they will reach their
potential in whatever field they choose!
Suffering is the elite athlete’s
best friend!
- See more at:
http://changingthegameproject.com/more-important-than-talent
